My character Claire hit my MC Morgan with this one when I was writing the other day: “Do you ever think that maybe you have continued to pursue a relationship with Aaron for so long because you don’t believe that you deserve happiness after what happened with Beau?”
This surprised me because I didn’t realize that this is exactly what Morgan had been doing. I always love when the truth comes out as I’m writing. But it also surprised me because I wonder how often we all self-sabotage because we feel unworthy.
In Morgan’s case, she continues to pursue a relationship that she knows will never work out and finally ends up leaving it behind because they end up living in different cities. It’s like the universe said, “Enough is enough.” But even then, it wasn’t enough because they ran into each other in Italy, which seems pretty magical, but they both knew that it was just an encore and not the whole show.
It really couldn’t be permanent.
It got me thinking about the things that we tolerate because we keep hoping they will turn out better: crappy jobs or relationships, health problems, bags of crap in the basement that we need to sort and drop off at Goodwill. They don’t go away on their own. We have to address them, ask ourselves why we’re keeping them, and ultimately, take out the trash.
For Morgan, taking out the trash means a little soul searching, and because the main action of the book involves a story that changes her life for the better, she lets her heart get swept up in that current, making the break from the previous relationship a little easier. The thing is, she had to be ready and willing to let go. Once she was, though, all the good things happen!
What are you holding onto that could be keeping you stuck? What one thing could you let go off that would change the energy of your space or your heart?